Failure really stinks. It’s a real downer, embarrassing, and can really knock your confidence down a peg if you allow it. But, here’s the kicker – failing can actually be a blessing in disguise. It can teach you some hard lessons that are super valuable. If you can muster the guts to face failure head-on, it can pay off big time in both your personal and professional life. When you’re not scared of messing up, you become braver in your career choices. And being willing to take risks – even if they lead to a flop every now and then – can pump up your reputation, spark your creativity, and open doors to new opportunities. It might even help you kickstart a new business, snag a dream job, or chase after your wildest dreams.
On the flip side, being scared of flopping can hold you back from success in every part of your life. It might stop you from pitching that killer idea to your boss for a promotion. It might prevent you from being your true self in a job interview, writing that book you’ve always wanted to or starting a game-changing business. Failure isn’t anyone’s idea of a good time, but mastering the art of failing, and more importantly, having the nerve to fail, can speed up your learning process and uncover opportunities you never thought possible.
To show you what failure can look like, let’s go back to 1995. A young British woman found herself in the pits after her marriage fell apart, leaving her a single parent without a job and broke as a joke. In her own words during a Harvard speech, she was living in poverty without being homeless. All her worst fears about herself had become reality; to her, she was the ultimate failure.
In her shoes, many would have thrown in the towel. Hitting rock bottom is no one’s idea of a good time, but that’s exactly where this young woman found herself. With nothing else to lose, she began to pen a tale about a wizard boy, a character she had dreamed up years before. She sent her finished manuscript to publisher after publisher, only to be met with a slew of rejections. No one wanted a children’s fantasy book.
Despite the setbacks, she persisted, hoping to just earn enough to put food on the table. Refusing to give up, she kept submitting her work. You probably already know what happened next – J.K. Rowling’s "Harry Potter" series shot to the top of the best-seller lists, and she now ranks among the wealthiest women globally. But Rowling’s success story was built on layers of failure, each one testing her resilience and grit.
Now, picture what might have been if Rowling had thrown in the towel after her first, second, or tenth rejection. Millions of kids would have missed out on the magic of "Harry Potter," and Rowling’s daughter might have grown up in poverty.
You might not be aiming to top the richest people charts, but think about the opportunities you might have missed out on by giving up after a few setbacks. We’ve all got a laundry list of times we’ve thrown in the towel, but instead of dwelling on the past, it’s more productive to realize we can change our ways and learn to push on when the going gets tough.
Failure is nobody’s idea of a picnic. We’re wired from a young age to see failure as the worst thing ever and start fearing any step that could lead us down the flopsville lane. As time goes on, we find it easier to just play it safe and resist taking bold risks or chasing wild ideas because we’re scared of faceplanting and looking like a total loser to others.
But clinging to safety all the time often lands you in a rut, stuck in a job that kills your spirit rather than one that lights the fire in your belly. We shove our talents aside and settle for ho-hum hobbies, never reaching our full potential. In a nutshell, we end up living a life that’s a shadow of what we could have if only we weren’t so freaked out about making a mess of things.
John C. Maxwell, a business icon and author, believes that the key difference between average Joes and high-fliers is how they view and react to failures and setbacks. The high-performers see failure as a chance to learn and rev up for a comeback armed with new skills and knowledge. On the flip side, the average bunch views failure as a nail in their coffin, a sign that they lack what it takes. They flop once, and suddenly it’s "I’m a loser."
Basketball legend Michael Jordan once shared with authors Robert Goldman and Stephen Papson that he’s missed thousands of shots, lost hundreds of games, and flubbed game-winning tries dozens of times. But those misses, those failures, they paved the way for his success. You can’t expect to win without tasting failure first. Jordan gets that failure is a crucial part of the learning curve. It hurts like heck, but it forces you to make a choice: run from it and head for easier ground, or embrace the pain, learn from it, and gear up for a triumphant round two.
You’re destined to bumble through life at some point. If you’re like most folks, those fumbles will come in droves. That’s why it’s golden to rethink your view of failure. By switching up your mindset and having the guts to own up to your missteps, you set yourself up to bounce back stronger and boost your shot at success down the line.
Learning from your falls demands a bit of humility and can feel awkward as heck. But digging into where you tripped up can be a game-changer if you stick with it. Here’s how to make the most of your missteps:
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Face the Music – You gotta admit when you’ve messed up. Yep, you. Taking the reins on your blunders and mishaps might feel like yanking a band-aid off, but you can’t fix things or grow unless you own your slip-ups. So, ‘fess up to your wrong turns. If your nosedive affected others, own up, apologize, and promise to do better.
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Understand You’re Not the Greatest…Yet – It’s a tough pill, but when you fail, you’ve got to accept that you missed the mark. It stings, no doubt. No one wants to realize they’re not up to snuff. But here’s the silver lining: you’re not there…yet. You fell short this time, but you’re capable of more. Your belly flop offers up essential feedback if you’re brave enough to dig for it. Let’s say you flubbed an interview for your dream job. Where did you mess up? What do you need to brush up on so you nail it next time? What’s the playbook for a win in the future? Remember, you’ve got the power to learn from your gaffes and level up for your next go around.
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Mull It Over – Sussing out your missteps can be tricky, especially when emotions are running high post-setback. Scribbling your thoughts and feels in a diary can be a huge help in sorting through your headspace and gaining fresh insight. The next time you hit a snag, set aside time at day’s end to jot down what went down. Spill out all your emotions on paper first. Rage, frustration, embarrassment – let it all out. Once you’ve vented, you’ll feel calmer and better poised to analyze the situation clearly and pinpoint your wrong turn. It also helps to spell out why you can’t repeat this goof-up. Did the slip tarnish your rep? Harm a colleague? Lead to a financial hit? Get specific about what went south and why it’s a no-go in the future.
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Flip the Script – Bigwig Richard Branson knows a thing or two about failure, having clocked numerous blunders in his career. In one of his oops moments, attempting a globe trot in a balloon almost cost him his life. But Branson’s stumbles taught him the immense value of failure. He reckons, "Taking risks should feel daunting, but overcoming that fear is the only way to sample new and thrilling experiences. We should embrace risk, not fear it. It’s one of our greatest teachers." For most folks, "failure" carries a truckload of negative juju. That’s why it might help to cast your slip-ups in a new light as learning ventures. Consider it a lesson in what not to do on your journey to the top. So dust off and take another shot.
In Closing, I dipped my toes in entrepreneurship waters at 22 and never looked back. Nearly two decades in, I can say with certainty that I’ve learned more from my flops than my wins. A major lesson I learned early on was how not to treat clients. The memory still stings of a colossal failure that drove this point home. A client wanted to use content I created for my blog in his marketing, but his ask rubbed me wrong, and I let my temper flare. A seasoned me would have hit pause, but inexperience won, and I fired off a scathing, insulting email. The next day, I wanted to vanish. I lost the client and my dignity. The sting remains 15 years on and likely always will. But that colossal flub taught me how to treat clients right – with respect, even in the heat of the moment. Yep, it hurt and was cringy, but I reckon that lesson shaped my success and made me a better human. Every failure can be your springboard to becoming a stronger, sharper you, but you’ve got to own it and learn. Tell me about your most gut-wrenching stumble and what it taught you?